Banned in (Not) Boston

If you don't get the title, you're not old enough. Try and Google it for the answer.

Today I got banned from a group on a photo sharing site. And man, am I upset about it.

Well, not really. Actually, not at all.

The person who runs the forum is a real narcissist, and someone who flaunts his monetary status to all. He looks down upon others less fortunate, and does not suffer criticism - or just plain observations negative to his opinions - at all. He has stated in the past how he will not "take my big fat wallet" into places, because he was not treated like a god. He recently stated that he was "used to the Hilton" and not "roughing it" in a Holiday Inn. I'm sure you see a pattern.

He runs his forum with an iron fist. If you stray off topic by a vowel or consonant, he closes down the thread. People who disagree with him disappear, just like in Stalinist Russia. And now it happened to me. Here's why, and you will see that I am completely innocent.

A person posted an Off Topic thread about their browser. I replied - with the sarcasm I am known for - that they angered the "God" of the forum, and he will come and smite you. It was pretty funny.

So this morning I get a message from our antagonist. Here is the message:

"Do you have a problem with the way I run the forum?"

I replied:

"I was being sarcastic.

Anyone who has spent more than 5 minutes on any of the *******-sponsored forums knows that you come down hard on people who post things not photography related.

You can run your little forums however you see fit; with either a heavy hand or light touch. It means nothing to me.

It may come as a shock to you, but there are many of us who are on forums for "the heck of it" to read what others say about photography. And we don't live and breath what one person's view contains.

I can quite easily quit your little forum because - in the real world outside of cyberspace - neither it nor you matter to me. I'm here to read what others say, possibly learn something, possibly help others to learn. But I don't life and breath it, and I don't blindly follow people. And I'm sarcastic.

So I guess if you don't want people like me in your little internet fiefdom, you should ban us "casual" readers/posters. I'm too old to worry about little things like this."

So a few hours later, I get a message saying I'm banned, and another message from our antagonist:

"As you wish...you are banned. And banned from any and all ******* activity."

I then penned (can you say "penned" when using a computer? Hmm...) a reply...

"You know, you just proved the point of a lot of people. You have too big of an ego, and can't take criticism or just plain observations.

You inquired as to whether I had a problem with the way you ran the forum, and I replied in a succinct manner - I don't care how you run it. It's your forum. And because you didn't like what I wrote in a personal message to you, you banned me. I did not "wish" for it, as you state. I said if you didn't like people of my kind, you should ban us. So you are being prejudiced and narrow-minded towards people who don't have your mindset. Oh yeah, and since I'm not a rich know-it-all, you hate me because I'm poor as well. Figures.

Of course, in all the forums I am on via this vast internet, you run yours more heavy-handed than anyone. Every other forum allows "semi" off-topic things, as long as they don't get out of control. I run five such forums in the science discipline. But that's not the point.

Have fun in your little world that has no concept of humor or relaxation. Of speaking the truth and hearing the truth.

I know I will have fun blogging about you and your treatment of people. I rarely talk about people beneath my social and mental status, but I can, and will.

Heh. Whatever. Life goes on. For some of us who work to live."

Well, turns out that he blocked me, and my message can't get delivered via the site's message program. Now, if I really cared, I could email him directly, but why bother? He and his type have major psychological issues, and will never admit their shortcomings or that they have a problem, even though people around them can see it plainly.

I just wrote this because I find the whole thing funny. The antagonist of this piece must be a small, insecure little man, as evidenced by his attitude. Some may feel sorry for him, but because I feel nothing, I could care less what he does, or what happens to him. He is to me what Orwell called a "non-person."

So there you go, dear readers. The story about how I was "Banned in Boston."

(I purposely kept the real names of the forum, the group, and other things that can be recognized anonymous, because "mr. antagonist" is more than happy to sue anyone he thinks wrongs him.)

Is the Universe about to Crash?

I just read something about the "WWT" or "World Wide Telescope." Sounds pretty good, doesn't it? But evil might possibly be lurking behind the name. And it might cause the destruction of the known (and unknown) Universe.

Why? Because the "World Wide Telescope" is a product of Microsoft!!

Yes, that Microsoft. The company of bugs, errors, and hacker/virus attacks. The monopolistic company who has a (near) stranglehold on PC OS's.

(Yeah, unfortunately I have PC's. But only until I get some money, then I'm all about the Mac's)

Are we going to be the citizens of a buggy universe? Will hackers and virus writers attack the Bug Nebula? And will Microsoft themselves charge "upgrade prices" for new eyepieces? Or larger telescopes to see farther?

"Yes, you can see the detail in QSO 3c273. You just need the upgrade. That will be (insert large number of monetary units) for your license key."

"I'm sorry, but 'Windows to the Universe Genuine Advantage Validation Tool' has determined your Universe to be a pirated version. To receive a key to a genuine Universe, please click here."

And what happens if you are observing something important, and the stars disappear and the sky turns blue? That brings the phrase "Blue Screen of Death" to proportions no one wants to think about. And just how would we go about rebooting the Universe? Would there actually BE a ctrl-alt-del?

Yes, be afraid people. Your existence could end at any time. When Microsoft gets involved, the Window to the Universe will be unstable.

(this article © Kevin. All rights reserved)

Twelve Commandments for Amateur Astronomers

1. Thou shalt have no white light before thee, behind thee, or to the side of thee whilst sharing the night sky with thy fellow stargazers.
2. Thou shalt not love thy telescope more than thy spouse or thy children; as much as, maybe, but not more.
3. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's telescope, unless it exceeds in aperture or electronics twice that of thy wildest dreams.
4. Thou shalt not read Astronomy or Sky & Telescope on company time, for thine employer makes it possible to continue thine astronomical hobby.
5. Thou shalt have at least two telescopes so as to keep thy spouse interested when the same accompanies thee under the night sky or on eclipse expeditions to strange lands where exotic wild animals doth roam freely.
6. Thou shalt not allow either thy sons or thy daughters to get married during the Holy Days of Starfest.
7. Thou shalt not reveal to thy spouse the true cost of thy telescope collection; only the individual components and that shall be done with great infrequency.
8. Thou shalt not buy thy spouse any lenses, filters, dew shields, maps, charts, or any other necessities for holidays, anniversaries, or birthdays unless thy spouse needs them for their own telescope.
9. Thou shalt not deceive thy spouse into thinking that ye are taking them for a romantic Saturday night drive when indeed thou art heading for a dark sky site.
10. Thou shalt not store thy telescope in thy living room, dining room, or bedroom, lest thou be sleeping with it full time.
11. Verily, observe not through thy neighbor's Astro-Physics or Takahashi, lest thee be utterly consumed by the lust of apo-fever, and thy brain and thy bank account shall shrivel and wither like branches in a flame.
12. Verily, observe not through thy neighbor's Dob of Goliath, lest thee be lain bare to the fires of aperture-fever, and thy sanity, thy sacroiliac and thy life savings be crushed as ye grapes of wrath.

Dave Barry's Year in Review

Even though he doesn't write on a regular basis - column-wise - anymore, Dave Barry still stays abreast of current events. His annual "Year in Review is always a hoot, and for 2006 he had some science goodies...

MARCH
...In other science news, thrilled NASA astronomers, in what they describe as a "smashing, surprising" discovery, announce that they have found evidence of pockets of water beneath the surface of Enceladus, one of the moons of Saturn, which strongly suggests -- as has long been suspected -- that astronomers do not get out much.

MAY
...the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, which has a budget of over $3 billion, predicts that the 2006 hurricane season will be worse than usual. This item will seem funnier later in the year. In related news, the voters of New Orleans re-elect Ray Nagin as mayor, proving that Hurricane Katrina killed far more brain cells than was previously believed.

JULY
...In other rocket news, the troubled U.S. space program suffers yet another setback when the launch of the shuttle Discovery is delayed for several days by Transportation Security Administration screeners, who insist that the astronauts remove their shoes before they go through the metal detector. Finally, however, Discovery blasts off and flies a flawless mission, highlighted by scientific experiments proving when you let go of things in space, they float around, same as last year.

Outer space remains in the news in...

AUGUST
...when the International Astronomical Union rules that Pluto will no longer be classified as a major planet, on the grounds that it is "less than half the size of James Gandolfini." A top U.S. law firm immediately files a class-action lawsuit on behalf of Pluto, as well as "anybody else who has been hurt by this ruling, or has ever experienced neck pain."

On the weather front, the until-now quiet hurricane season erupts in fearsome fury in the form of Tropical Storm Ernesto, which hurricane experts, using scientific computer models, predict could become a major storm and inflict devastation upon Texas, or possibly Florida, or Connecticut. A state of near-panic sets in as millions of coastal residents jam gas stations, hardware stores and supermarkets, while many schools and businesses close. Tension mounts for days, until finally Ernesto slams into Florida with all the fury of a diseased fruit fly. Life slowly returns to normal for everyone except the ever-vigilant hurricane experts, who immediately begin scanning their scientific computer simulations for the next potentially deadly threat.

NOVEMBER
...In other good news, with four days left in the virtually storm-free 2006 hurricane season and still no storms in sight, U.S. weather experts, citing new data, predict that the season will end up having been very mild. This forecast turns out to be right on the money, but the experts waste no time on self-congratulation, as they immediately begin making scientific predictions for next year's hurricane season, which, they warn, could be a bad one.

Like I said, he's always hilarious.

Lack of Spirit

You know, driving around all the time "just seeing the sights" has got to get boring after a while...

Mars Rover Beginning To Hate Mars